Are There Sports Movies For Non-Sports People?

One of my modern journalism pet peeves is when article titles are yes or no baitclick questions designed to shock or subvert expectation. So here's my answer up top: Do those movies exist? Maybe. Probably.

But what I'm trying to get at by asking the question is my general struggle with the sports movie genre and what it expects of the audience. For total transparency, I have huge gaps in my sports movie canon - I have not seen Rocky, or Bull Durham, or Friday Night Lights. But I've seen so many episodes of Starsky & Hutch and Quantum Leap about boxing and wrestling and all number of black-eye activities that take place in a ring, plus Someone Up There Likes Me, that I feel equipped to say it is the most visually boring sport I've ever had to sit through. Was not particularly keen on Remember The Titans so avoided The Blind Side. I could be convinced to watch something about Ali but I'd want it to be a character study, not a rundown of his most famous fights.

Which I think is a core problem of a lot of these films - you have to already enjoy watching the sport at hand to be entertained. Much like Mosquito Squadron, where, unless you are really into aviation or have an affinity for David McCallum's cute angular nose, there's not much that's going to be there for you. They're like hobby movies, you've already invested a lot of time and energy before you go in.

I'm not allergic to all types of sports, though. There's theoretically plenty of overlap between watching a game of football and a live action session of D&D. I've sunk enough hours into League of Legends that I once considered paying to watch an e-sports tournament. While these are live events, and therefore don't have the narrative trappings of a sports movie formula, I can certainly get into the spirit of those victories, losses, ups, and downs, that come with each story.

In the 90s and early 2000s, Disney Channel had a glut of sports movies for kids that took on everything imaginable. Brink for skaters. Johnny Tsunami for surfboarding and snowboarding (and skiing). Double Teamed featured twins on opposite basketball teams. Alley Cats Strike which melded the 90s new swing fad with Big Lebowski and also just freaking ruled. Double Teamed was maybe my least favorite (felt too maudlin even for 11 year old me) but it's possible that those films were fun because they made such a point of showing the viewer how cool the sport was. There's no assumption that everyone is anyone is going to be particularly gung-ho for bowling. (Then again, Nickelodeon made soooo many episodes of Rocket Power which functioned on the same principle. Not for me.)

I also think that's why Cool Runnings is such fun sports film. There's a lot of bobsledding in the film, obviously, but because the sport seems out of left field it gives a new life to the narrative. There aren't many sports films that can also call themselves comedies. Maybe it's a combination of 90s optimism and novelty that makes it enjoyable. I'm still waiting for a sports movie about hobby collecting.

I'm showing Cool Runnings this Thursday at A Baked Joint.

PS: I literally just remembered A League of Their Own. Okay, fine. Sports movies are cool.

The Fanthropologist is a free weekly newsletter by Lena Barkin. Paid subscribers get access to commenting and weekly discussion posts. If you'd like to support the newsletter; tell your friends, consider leaving a tip, or sign up for a subscription.